Hi, sweet friend! Wish I could look into your eyes and tell you how loved you are! But in the meantime, here's what you need to know about me:
I'm a wife, a mama, and a recovering perfectionist. I've been married to Ryan for 17 years, and I'm a mama to Selah (15), Gavin (13), and Emery (11). I have no idea what I’m doing, but somehow they’ve made it this far.
I’m dramatic and sensitive. I’m far too critical of myself and others. I rarely live up to my own expectations. I’m more insecure than I let people believe, and sometimes I wonder why anyone puts up with my boatload of crazy.
I’m a mess…and I’m done pretending that I’m not.
I spent most of my life trying to be perfect and coming up short in comparison with everyone else. Now I’m falling for the scandalous grace of a God who never stops pursuing my crazy, wandering, overwhelmed, learning-to-be-free heart.
Here's what you might want to know. Are you ready? It's quite the whirlwind. If you pay too close attention, you might get whiplash.
I grew up in the desert of Arizona. Right after highschool, I attended Capernwray Bible School in Cambridge, New Zealand. Wanna know why? I looked at the map and it looked like the farthest place away from home that I could find. I was looking at a flat map, where the U.S. and New Zealand are on opposite sides. What I didn't know was that on a globe, they actually aren't as far apart as I thought. :)
It was there, surrounded by fluffy sheep and rolling green hills, that I fell in love with Jesus, and my future husband, Ryan. And so began the whirlwind. I moved to North Carolina and prepared to settle into domestic bliss.
But how boring would that be?
After our first child was born, we moved to Costa Rica as missionaries. I was the worst missionary.
We moved back to NC, had another baby, struggled something fierce with postpartum depression, and discovered what it meant to cling to Jesus for my very life. We then moved to Colorado. That's where I grew up. Well, sort of. I'm still practically a baby.
After 8 years in Colorado, one more baby, and God delivering me from the abyss of depression, we moved to Arizona. I'd love to tell you the story sometime about how God can make rivers flow in the desert. No, really, there's a place in AZ where it does! But he did it in my heart, too.
And then we settled down and lived happily ever after ... fat chance! Nope! In a miraculous twist of events, God sold our house that wasn't for sale, took our small dreams for our life and family, and gave us a bigger dream for his kingdom. So we moved to Australia to teach Bible at Capernwray Bible School!
I told you you would get whiplash if you followed along.
I'd love to tell you the stories of our time in Australia. The way God moved. The love he lavished on us. The lives he changed.
We're now in Charlotte, NC. The plan is to stay put. But, I've been on this wild ride with God long enough that learned that my plans are better surrendered. A life lived with open hands is where abundant life is found.
Oh, in all of that, I also worked on a M.A. in Theological Studies. I'm almost finished. I've almost lost my mind a few times in the process, too :)